time for OWLS!

Weird stuff from old journals.

Ode To A Beloved Cousin:

Frustration.

Words can not convey

The concern I feel

For the unnecessary pain

Caused by a lack of unwillingness to pause

And see that life is not the enemy

And you are not it's hostage, or a victim -

But a prisoner of your own illusion.

I don't have the capacity to make you see.

My words fall short

And still there is no peace inside your soul.

It knows it could be so much more, and yet

It won't believe.

Stubbornly

You sit in the midst of a disaster

You say is all your fault

But your only fault is your choice.

Consequences are natural.

Anyone can wreak havoc with little effort.

But I see a light, an escape -

Everything you miss and hope for

Are more than just memories and dreams -

He lives.

This Morning

"Suppose there is a well of fathomless trouble inside your heart, and Jesus comes and says "Let not your heart be troubled," and you shrug your shoulders and say "But Lord, the well is deep; you cannot draw up quietness and comfort out of it." No, He will bring them down from above. Jesus does not bring anything up from the wells of human nature... The well of your incompleteness is deep, but make the effort and look away to Him." -Oswald Chambers

Lately

This post is dedicated to Rosydreamer.

Learning: That even the smallest things can alter my attitude towards God. Checking Facebook first thing in the morning will squelch my desire to pray, while praying in the morning will squelch my desire to shop later on (shopping is something I do when I'm anxious).

"You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me."
John 15:3-4


Also, my mom has a new blog! Check it out.

Happy Hope Week!

So, true to my word, I did buy an Advent Wreath (er... candle holder). Sadly, I found no "authentic" Advent items (or Nativity Scenes for that matter) but I did make my own and I suppose that gives it more meaning. Yesterday we lit the "Hope" candle, read a Bible passage, and prayed together. It was a sweet way to remember the true meaning of Christmas.

In case you'd like to join, you can learn more about Advent here.

Merry Christmas?

The other day I was listening to Christmas music in my office, when my coworker walked in. She asked me if I liked Christmas music and I said yes. She said she couldn't stand it, and that if not for her children she probably wouldn't celebrate Christmas at all. Appalled, I asked her why not. She explained that the holiday had lost it's meaning and turned into a celebration of commercialism. (Mind you, my co-worker is not particularly religious.) This struck me, because I do consider myself to be religious (well, I don't actually use the word "religious", but you know what I mean). It struck me because I claim to celebrate the "true meaning" of Christmas and yet my response to the situation is very different. I love Christmas and everything that comes with it. Maybe something is wrong with me... the thought continued to disturb me over the weekend. I thought about it Sunday morning while singing at church. I looked around at people praising God with arms outstretched, and then I remembered that we do have something to celebrate. And while the world has made Christmas a self-centered season, that's no reason for me not to celebrate it's true meaning. In fact, how much more should Christians feel the warmth and excitement of this "holy day"? Every good and perfect gift comes from above. All of the things I love about Christmas originated in Christ. I don't have to choose between celebration and solemnity. In fact, in the Old Testament God actually commanded His people to celebrate. The verse comes to mind: "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven." (Matthew 5:16)

I think I'm going to make an Advent Wreath.

A Quote

"If God has made your cup sweet, drink it with grace; if He has made it bitter, drink it in communion with Him." - Oswald Chambers